THIS IS THE PART WHERE WE HAVE $EX

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(I’m running errands for my pregnant wife. While walking to a nearby store, I see two teenagers harassing a child that is only four or five years old. I shoo them away from the boy, and he introduces himself.)
Me: “So, where’s your mom at?”
Boy: “She’s in the store. Do you have kids?”
Me: “Not yet. We’re expecting a baby girl soon, though.”
Boy: “Well, she’s going to turn out nice, like you! So, I’m going to marry her someday!”
(I laugh, and play along while I bring him to the service desk, and wait until his mom picks him up. Six years later, my daughter comes home from school and introduces us to a friend that defended her against a bully on the playground. I didn’t recognize him, but he certainly knew who I was!)
aspiring-inspiration:

Mr Moseby is done with your shit

lokidindeed:

i-deduce-youre-a-bitch:

YOU NIQQAS WANNA LEARN ELVISH?! HERE YA GO!

(via meanwhileinrasputinspants)

(Source: musicalhog, via meanwhileinrasputinspants)


me doing a power point presentation in class

Inca Tern, a species of bird that lives in the Pacific coastline from northern Peru to central Chile are famous for their manly “mustache”.

did-you-kno:

Source

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The many faces of Johnny Depp-Tim Burton Style

(Source: timburtonsblog, via say-you-love--satan)

10 Signs That You Are Too Dependent

psych-quotes:

There’s a fine line between leaning on your friends or your partner, and being too dependent. It’s easy to fall into a trap of depending on other people for everything in your life, but it’s not a healthy way to live. Here are 10 signs that you are too dependent on others:

 

1.    You check with your friends before you date someone. If you’d never dream of dating someone that your friends didn’t ok beforehand, then you are too dependent. It’s great to look for a partner that your friends like and get along with, but it’s going too far if you have to get their approval before considering dating someone. If you avoid dating someone because you don’t think your friends would approve, you could be missing out on some great relationships.

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familyfriendlyurl:

when i was in grade 3 our class was having a party and i brought in the shrek soundtrack and everyone loved it and the girl i had a crush on winked at me i owe everything to shrek

(via meanwhileinrasputinspants)

ultimate sign of trust is me handing you my laptop or phone without hesitation

(Source: starkstower, via meanwhileinrasputinspants)

mrmayi:

Tyler “Telle” SmithThe Word Alive

"You are terrifying and strange and beautiful. Something not everyone knows how to love."

- Warsan Shire (via cybergirlfriend)

(Source: hellanne, via meanwhileinrasputinspants)